So, there I was, minding my own business eating dinner at around 7:30 at night when my phone rang. I didn’t recognize the number on my caller ID, and thought to myself, maybe a new client. I answer the phone, and they began to tell me that they were promoting a show in my area. I asked for some details. They told me they needed a PA for four bands, and that it was to be held in a giant “steel” circus tent.
Then comes the question… “How much is this going to cost me?” I gave them a price, which is already well below normal rates, and what do you think the response was? That’s right…“this is a charity event, and we only have X amount budgeted (peanuts).” As I nearly hang up the phone, I think to myself, it’s right down the street from my shop and I don’t have any shows booked for that date. Did I mention that the show was in three days? So, I agree to do the show only to be compensated for labor (peanuts).
The day of the show comes and my “help” shows up 45 minutes late after a relative and I (remember the peanuts) were already finished unloading the truck. Here comes the first curve. The promoter arrives and informs me that there’s a birthday party in progress and we could not have the venue until 2 p.m. for a 3 p.m. sound check. Again, big metal circus tent with scary clowns! If I hadn’t already unloaded the truck, I probably would have left. I stress the importance of being able to set up the PA as soon as possible in order to have the show up on time. Finally, I am able to start the load-in, again just me and my faithful relative volunteer.
The load-in goes smoothly, and we are wiring the stage for the “headliner.” I ask them where they want the monitors placed. The response I received was a glimpse of how the rest of the night was going to go. They looked at me with a dull, cold, blank stare and said, “I dunno.” What! You are the headliners, signed by a large recording company owned by mice and you don’t even know where you want your monitors? So, I put four monitors across the front of the stage and one for the drummer.
During the headliner sound check, the client comes up and gives me a timeline for the event. I peruse the novel I just received and it began to hit me. The lineup went from four bands in four hours to 15 acts in four hours. Yes, 15! At this point, the system is already set up and functional, so I had no choice but to roll with it.
As the night progressed, all the acts had apparently watched that same ‘80s documentary about a rock band. “This amp goes to eleven!” One band was flown in from out of state. Great, these guys might actually be good. They began to play, and my “help,” who arrived shortly after load-in, had to leave the room because he was laughing hysterically. Maybe they could have hired some good local talent and paid me a little more peanuts?
All in all, the night went as well as it could. We were able to finish ahead of schedule, despite the numerous acts and multiple stage personalities. I have learned that nothing is as it seems. I don’t think I like peanuts anymore… maybe I’ll try dough.
Matt Buffington
C.T.E Productions
