The doldrums are upon us and the wind has gone out of the sails of our good ship audio as we drift listlessly in a sea of calm. We have powered ourselves at a breakneck pace out of the old year and into the new and, as always, our charted course delivers us directly into a dead calm where we will drift for approximately two months or so while our live sound industry moves forward at a languid pace. Although the newer seafarers might be surprised by the seasonal torpor, the more experienced salty dogs among us know the drill and prepare accordingly. Arrgh matey, that just isn’t true and you know it!
The truth of the matter? No matter how long we have been traveling the high seas of sound, January and February always seems to sneak up on us and take us by surprise. As soon as the New Year celebrations are behind us, my inbox fills up with resumes of road warriors who for a month or so find themselves either out of work or with a drastically reduced schedule and paycheck. Many of those resumes I receive are impressive. And as much as I would like to put some of these skilled technicians to work swabbing the decks and charting courses through unexplored frequencies, I cannot, due to the fact that I have been traveling a similar course and have hit the doldrums at the very same time.
Some people I know are prepared for the seasonal slowdown, but for the most part we live day to day and gig to gig, and when we’re busy we just don’t think of what we’re going to do during the time of the doldrums. The first couple of weeks are not that bad. We all need the downtime that comes as a welcome respite from the intense end of year workload and — unless one has a trust fund or is very frugal — the third week starts to be a drain on the bank account, causing a mild panic that begins to mount as the weeks drag on.
Land Ahoy!
Of course, just as it seems the ship is about to go down, the tours start kicking in and the sails fill with wind once again. Finally, when the work does come in, I reach out to those engineers who desperately sent me resumes while they were set adrift. Suddenly, all inform me they’ve successfully navigated out of the doldrums and now have full schedules and have signed on for tours of duty taking them to such exotic places as Europe, Japan, Brazil and East Bumphuckopia. Although this mass exodus leaves me scrambling for technicians, the upside is that all the road weary seafarers will be back by the second day of the following year and ready to work. Woo hoo!
It’s a vicious cycle, and before I normalized my life by taking a desk job, I too was a scurvy scallywag roaming the deep in search of fame, fortune and high seas adventure. I would put on my eye patch, tie my scarf to my head and off I would go to rape, pillage and mix shows in far away exotic lands singing like the famous Captain Jack Sparrow:
“Yo ho, it’s a pirates life for me.
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, we loot:
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.
We kidnap and ravage and don’t give a hoot:
Yo ho, it’s a pirates life for me.”
Living “La Vida Pirate”
Unfortunately for most of us, living the pirate’s life alone is not enough to sustain our extravagant lifestyles. Much like any other job in the entertainment industry, we pirates need to multi-task and wear more than just our three cornered hat. There is no single solution for multiple hat-wearing, but it’s a good idea for any scurvy sea dog to establish themselves with an audio company, a studio, a theater, a club or a stagehands union before signing on to the pirate life. It’s a tough adjustment coming home after being on the road, and picking up random freelance gigs isn’t easy for the short time one is on hiatus. Most gig holders tend to be loyal to the few techs who have faithfully endured during the year and to those who will also still be available after all the swashbucklers are long gone.
It’s the doldrums and there is not much one can do about it, except find some sort of productive way to bide the time other than eightballs and hookers. Not only is the latter counter-productive for all you pirates, but unless you are single, live in a rent-free environment and have been on a major tour, this activity will consume all of one or two days before your money and peace of mind are gone.
Use That Time Wisely, Laddies
If you can afford it, now’s the time to take a vacation or visit friends and family you may have neglected while swashbuckling through exotic locals. If the friends and family thing is out of the question, try living frugally until the wind picks up again, but if you do want to work, it’s a good idea to make yourself available to do everything from inventory, load-in/out work or even something of your choice unrelated to the audio field. Don’t forget to let everybody you know that you are home and available for anything that should arise.
The doldrums are a tough place to be stuck, but it’s a fact of life in our world, and one should be prepared for it, since it comes on a regularly scheduled basis. If you can hang in there, just keep your tri-cornered hat, eye patch and wooden leg packed and ready to go. The doldrums will be over before you know it, and in no time at all, it will be back to the pirate’s life for you, with smooth sailing (until the next time the wind dies down).
