OK, it's official–I'm an audio expert. No, really, I'm not just saying this to impress; I am officially an expert and I can prove it. Unfortunately, at this time, if I do reveal any references, names or places I will have to erase the reader's memory by writing a subliminal memory erase code into this text. This, of course, I'd like to avoid at all costs because it is not a specific memory erase code and, if used, may erase much more of the user's memory than necessary. It could mean that the reader, while not being able to remember anything written in this article, may also lose the capability to remember things like how to set up gain structure, how to read an input list or even simple things such as the formula for Ohm's law or how to use the internal computer on the Midas H- 3000 console. Therefore, be satisfied with the information I give you and all will be well. It all started with a phone call from a lawyer who had gotten my name through a third-party acquaintance. He stated to me that a certain audio company was suing a certain club for not paying their bill, and that said club was in need of an expert witness to advance with their defense of the litigation. Apparently, the audio company had already chosen their expert witness and was ready to proceed. Interestingly, up until that moment I had never thought of myself as an expert anything, especially as a witness.
I always like to think that I learn something new every day, which in turn keeps me from puffing up with attitude and making stupid comments such as, "Do you know who I am?" I also know quite a few people in this business who I respect and perceive as experts, which made me think that I might not be qualified enough. The other thought that came to me is, "A little knowledge is a dangerous thing," and that there are quite a few people I have come across in my travels who are blessed with "a little knowledge" who consider themselves experts at what they do–with grave results.
That said, the lawyer sent me reams of paperwork to read so that I would know how to apply my expertise to the case. I found the text a fascinating tome and could not put it down. But when I finally finished reading all the material, I felt like taking a shower and washing myself with a strong soap to cleanse the slime and erase the stench that seemed to be clinging to me. Frankly, from what I could discern, both sides were equally sleazy in their intent and action and deserved each other as dancing partners, but this opinion was not what was expected of me as an expert. All that was required of me was to state whether or not the club was being overcharged for the equipment. So, I took the job which now legally qualifies me as an expert in my field and therefore, from now on, for everyone who does not know me, you can all refer to me as "Mr. Expert." As for my friends, I expect them to still call me "Sahib" or "Kimosabe," as always, but please remember to bow three times when entering or exiting my presence.
Basically, what happened is that a representative of the club, who claimed to be one of the owners, ordered a sound system from a company with which he always did business. The audio company then came in and removed the existing system and proceeded to install–over a period of six weeks–a multipurpose system throughout the club. Some sort of financial agreement was made and the system stayed for a year before it was legally extracted. Here is what I gleaned from my reading of the transcripts and depositions: No real contract was signed; the person who ordered the system really didn't have the authority to do so; there was some overcharging regarding the installation; some money was paid; some cronyism was involved and the real owner said that he never approved the installation–even though it took six weeks. It seemed as though there was a hustle taking place on both sides of the playing field.
Anyway, that is all I can say without erasing your collective memories, but what I started to think about was how we, as audio professionals, charge for our services and how we set prices for our equipment. First of all, let me state that we can only charge for our equipment in regard to what the regional market can or is willing to support. Therefore, in one city, a system might be more costly to rent than the same equipment in another region, city or state. This discrepancy in pricing is caused by the difference in the price of doing business in one town or another. The cost of maintaining of- fices, warehouses, parking, labor and trucking are all factors in deciding what a company might need to charge for their equipment. A proprietary company working out of their garage with one system can possibly afford to charge a little less for a rental than the large company with a huge overhead.
Granted, we all have the flexibility to discount equipment, but for one company to drastically undercut another company just to get a job undermines everybody's earning potential, and therefore, we try to follow some sort of guideline in regard to system rentals. There are a few companies that will lease equipment with the option to buy at the end of the lease. Basically, this is a bank loan for any company that qualifies, and for the most part, the loan will not exceed $250,000. The terms are three to five years at approximately two and one half points per monthly payment. This means that payments for a system that costs $100,000 will be $2,500 per month for a term that will ensure the leasing company a return on their dollar plus interest. If the rental company charges one percent of the total cost for this system, which is somewhat standard, then they need to rent out the system five times a month to double their monthly cost of the lease. If the company can rent out the system five times a month for two years, they will have paid off the system (not including the interest) and have made a $20,000 profit. Ironically, the rental of a smaller piece, such as a $1,500 microphone, might rent on a daily basis for five to ten percent of its cost, and at that rate, need only rent once a week for two-and-a-half to five months before it has paid for itself.
While I cannot really say much more regarding the lawsuit, I will say that all parties involved were somewhat shady in their dealings and that it is advisable to have contracts when dealing with large sums of money. Audio companies need to adhere to some sort of standard to remain ethical while being competitive. If one is thinking of starting their own business, they need to figure out who their clientele might be and in which market they will be competing so they can understand how long it will take to make a return upon their investment. The "expert" guidelines I have put forth in this writing will definitely help should anyone feel compelled to torture themselves by starting a rental company or by trying to make a livelihood as a soundperson. While I have not shared all of my expertise, I fear I have said too much already, and I now need to erase your memories. Please focus on this phrase, "I could have been a lawyer."
