For obvious reasons, some things just don’t lend themselves to being good rental items. It’s not hard to visualize why expendable pieces such as guitar picks, drum sticks and drum heads would not be acceptable for a rental after the first use. Things such as horn reeds and harmonicas have an overt factor of “disgusting” in terms of using them as a rental. These pieces are personal items with which any given musician shares their bodily fluids. Okay, okay, don’t get overly imaginative here. I’m only referring to saliva.
However, considering the amount of germs and viruses available in today’s communicable disease market, I for one would certainly want to be in a committed, long-term relationship to any person with whom I was sharing spit. Yes, even if it was dried spit. It’s entirely possible that the harp could be soaked in Listerine or some other disinfectant, yet I can only perceive a harp or reed rental as tantamount to sharing a piece of toilet paper or a tissue with another person. By the way, just to be completely clear about the matter; I am not a germophobe, but odds are that I would never share the former or latter paper products with anyone — regardless of how committed or long-term the relationship might be.
Ear (Bud) Wax
Placing an object in a body cavity and sharing it with another person might be acceptable in certain types of films, but there are definite limitations in applying this camaraderie in the audio rental market. I am referring here to in-ear monitors and, while more and more musicians have taken the plunge to purchase their own set of in-ear molds, there are those who still rely on a rental house to provide them with buds. Although it is entirely possible to change the foam or rubber bulb on the ear buds, it is the stem from which the audio emits that usually poses the problem for the hygienically conscious musician or soundperson.
Initially, we would send the buds out with the transmitter/ receiver for any given rental and, upon return, we would change the foams and clean the stem with a toothpick. Let me correct myself — I use the term “we” loosely, since it was the shop guy who would be responsible for cleaning the copious amount of wax from within the stem of the bud, and not me. That said, it didn’t take long for the shop guy to become utterly disgusted with his new duties and inform me — in no uncertain terms — that cleaning genetic material out of ear buds was not in his job description. Either I would have to hire someone else to do the job or find an alternate solution to the dirty ear bud dilemma.
A Happy Solution
Thankfully, the solution was an easy one and — instead of sending generic buds with the ear units — we began to sell brand new buds to those clients who were without their own. As an aside, the shop guy who refused to clean the buds finally quit audio and is now a practicing proctologist in the Tri-State area. It’s probably just my vanity, but even though my role in his achievement is minor, I do like to think that by assigning him certain duties I had a hand in (no pun intended!) helping him choose his current vocation — or not.
Other than the previously mentioned items, there are certain pieces of gear that I would recommend musicians provide for themselves. Usually this pertains to must-have pieces that might not be easily rented in every market; such as specific cymbals, guitar strings, snare drums and amplifiers. Exotic instruments, digital interfaces, plug-ins and microphones should all be part of the touring repertoire for the discerning musician as well.
Many audio techs prefer to carry their own mics when doing one-offs, since they are not always assured of getting what they require. If a certain artist has a piano sound that can be only be captured with a particular combination of microphones, then it’s in the best interest of that audio crew to bring their own and not to rely on a rental house to provide for an uncompromised sound. Some vocalists insist upon using their own high-end wireless microphones, but the majority of lead vocalists and backup singers often rely upon the local audio company or venue to provide a microphone for their use.
Despite the wonderful mic choices that most venues and audio providers can provide, it still baffles me that vocalists would not have their own microphone they take to every gig. Even if it’s nothing more than the industry-staple Shure SM58, a personal microphone makes sense in the same manner as a personal sax reed, harmonica or in-ear monitor buds. I am not suggesting that a borrowed microphone may have been inside anyone’s mouth — or any other orifice — but in my experience (and in worst-case scenarios), I have seen singers expectorate and sweat on microphones.
I have seen singers performing while smoking and drinking. I have also seen singers on stage performing while they were sick and running a fever. Some mics get dropped on the stage and others are sent into the crowd for a drunken sing-along. At the end of a night, the microphones are placed in a trunk or a crate with all the other microphones and then wheeled out the next day for more of the same. Diligent audio engineers do try to clean the microphone screens, but not all audio engineers are so conscientious.
Some Final Advice
My question to vocalists is, “Why take a chance?” Go out and find the best sounding microphone for your voice and then bring it with you to every show or gig you do. Unlike a set of drums, it’s small and easy to carry around. If having an instrument is too daunting of a proposition and you have a regular audio engineer, leave the microphone in their care. Coddle it and treat it in the same way the guitarist treats their prize 1957 Stratocaster.
After all, it is your instrument, it is your sound and in a best-case scenario, it will be only your own DNA that you are interacting with on a daily basis.
